Allow Me To Be Me

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asoundmind

I am weary from the desires of those whom would tell me what and who I should be.

This is not based on God’s vision He has given  me,

but on their lives and their perspective that God has shown to them.

I am not you, I am me; wonderfully and uniquely made but different from how He designed you.

Others seem to have endless energy, and can go on and on and on,

but You have created me with a quiet spirit and limited energies.

I used to despise that in myself, I wanted to be like the others, never hindered by weariness.

But You Lord showed me that I was created by design, Your perfect plan specifically for me.

When I am tired and weak I can rest safely in Your arms, knowing that You understand my frustration with it.

Even though You have gifted others with endless…

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Allow Me To Be Me

I am weary from the desires of those whom would tell me what and who I should be.

This is not based on God’s vision He has given  me,

but on their lives and their perspective that God has shown to them.

I am not you, I am me; wonderfully and uniquely made but different from how He designed you.

Others seem to have endless energy, and can go on and on and on,

but You have created me with a quiet spirit and limited energies.

I used to despise that in myself, I wanted to be like the others, never hindered by weariness.

But You Lord showed me that I was created by design, Your perfect plan specifically for me.

When I am tired and weak I can rest safely in Your arms, knowing that You understand my frustration with it.

Even though You have gifted others with endless energy, I have been given a restful calm to allow my spirit to connect sweetly with Yours.

You have taught me as I surrender myself to You, just as I am, there I find the fullness and richness of the life designed especially for me.

Love Can Look Different

My heart heavy with fear, not knowing what the day will bring. I pray and still I don’t hear. My soul has fallen into the  deepest , darkest depths.

God shouts, “Do not fear!” yet I am surrounded by taunting’s of all my deepest fears.

I cry, “Lord help me, see this horrible place I’m in, please rescue me.”

“It is you who has placed yourself in that place — your thoughts, your imaginations have entombed you there.” spoke the Lord to my heart.

Transform my thoughts oh God, give me hope to live again, set my mind free from the dark thoughts and lies I have believed. My soul pleads to you, I am trying to believe, I am trying to hope, I am trying not to be afraid — see my suffering oh God!

As the butterfly must struggle and work to be free or it will die, The Lord knows that so must I. He cannot do the work for me that I need to do or I will surely die. God’s magnificent love, encourages me to grow, but will not step in and do what is mine only to do. He alone knows exactly what it is that I need, He alone knows what must happen for my wings to spread wide open and fly.

God’s perfect love may not look like you expect it to, but it is exactly what you and I need it to be.

A Christian Introvert

Last night I was blessed with an opportunity to share God’s victories in my life with the women in my friends bible study group.

It’s so funny because if you knew anything about me, you would know that I am an Introvert. More often then not people misunderstand what being an Introvert means; there is so much more to it than being a shy, wall-flower.

An introvert simply reacts to life, and is energized by life and needs to decompress from life differently. After having lived a life feeling like I was strange and that something was very wrong with me, I have come to understand it differently.

My father is an introvert, my younger brother and my son are also introverts. It is my son who wanted to understand why the things that stimulated his friends had a tendency to wear him out, and leave him drained. He wanted to know why he wasn’t able to get the same satisfaction out of social events and other activities as his friends.

So he took the challenge to investigate it after a mentor had encouraged him to consider that he might be both a H.S.P, a Highly Sensitive Person and an Introvert. He wanted my son to realize that he had gifts and talents that his friends didn’t have because of his personality, and that they were positive attributes, not curses and we had often discussed they felt like.

So through my son’s journey to understand, he in-turn shared these revelations with me. I will never forget the day he said to me, “Mom I think you are an Introvert and I think this book, The Introvert Advantage, may be something you should read.” It is both humbling and thrilling to come to that point in your life where your child can teach you something.

It was life-changing for me, is the best way I can sum it up. Over the past few years I now am able to embrace my differences instead of being ashamed of them. Instead of  complying with my extrovert friends insisting that I would and should enjoy certain activities and circumstances I just smile and say, “No Thank You.” I no longer try to force my square personality into the round peg. I am learning to be comfortable with all of who I am rather than compare myself to everyone else.

So last night as I stood before these women and shared, I had to smile to myself, amazed at all that God has done in my life to bring me to that place. I am now free to flow in the gifts and talents that He has placed in my life, and then He blesses me again as He uses those gifts to bless others!

God Still Loves Me

Even when I fail to be,
the person that I want to see,
God still loves me.

When I walk in my flesh,
When all my choices are selfish,
God still loves me.

I do not do what I say I”ll do,
Life interrupts my good intentions,
Yet God still loves me.

I can try and hide my face with shame,
There is a voice calling to my heart,
“I still love you!”

 

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SE Colorado Race for the Cure

For anyone in the Colorado Springs area, this year’s Susan G. Komen, Race for the Cure is on Sunday, September 8th in Garden of the Gods Park. I am volunteering for the race so I will be there handing out materials from our corporate sponsors.

Please consider making up a team, walking with friends, or even volunteering to help with this amazing event.

On a personal note, this is important to me because I had a sister who survived 9 years after being diagnosed with breast cancer and then developed a secondary cancer from which she passed away on September 9, 2010 at the age of 55. So I do this in memory of my friend and sister, Karen.

My Inheritance is Great

The enemy closes in and whispers threatening words in my ears;

My first instinct is to be afraid, to tremble in fear.

Then the Holy Spirit in me says, NO! Do not fear! You are the daughter of the King.

Your inheritance is great, all that you need will be provided.

Your promise is of perfect health, peace of mind,  and financial blessings.

Will you respond as you always have before, or will step out of your past and take your rightful place?

“What have you learned my daughter”?

That I have been given authority over the enemy, his was taken from him at the cross.

That I stand beside Christ and I am not subject to any plot, lie or evil plan of the enemy.

That I am able to resist his evil plans and him away from me as far as the east is from the west.

That I have the Holy Spirit in me to guide me in wisdom, knowledge and understanding.

My response is to stand in that authority given to me and resist the enemy and he MUST flee!

So will I weep and whine and ask God, “Why me”? Will I tremble and hide in fear?

How then should I respond — as I always have before?

NO! I will refuse those lies, I will refuse to lose hope.

I will refuse to hide in fear, to become depressed, discouraged and without purpose.

My God says, “Do not lean on your own understanding.”

My God says He will never ever leave me.

My God says that He will protect me under His powerful wings.

He says to look to Him, to trust in Him, to hope in Him who can see from the beginning and the end.

I will not return to whom I was before and respond as I always have.

I will not wallow in fear and despair.

I will hope in the Lord and He will NEVER fail me!

I will praise His name and shout of His Great Mercies!

I will have Victory because I will look not to myself but  to my Lord my God, The Great I AM!

What is the Truth?

As a spiritual being God’s truth, His promises, should be our reality. God desires that we die to our flesh and live by His Spirit in us. That means that your reality must learn to lean towards your spiritual side, the one that the world doesn’t know or accept as truth.

We must believe that no matter how hard things may get (or seem) God will never leave you. That God wants the very best for your life even though it doesn’t look that way at times. That He WILL restore the years that have been stolen from you.

The Spiritual Truths don’t agree with the truths of this world, but they are the truths, that if we are to live as a spiritual being, we must stand on and believe in no matter how things appear to be.

Who are you going to listen to, the enemy who is a liar, and a theif and a destroyer, or God who is the truth, our hope and everlasting love?

Will it always be easy — NO! Our flesh is weak and cries out so loudly to be heard. It is used to being fed and it always wants more.

But God is gentle and doesn’t force Himself on us, He waits for us to choose Him through faith.

And what is faith? Is it based on the realities of what we are facing in our lives right now or is it believing in the truth that God has promised to us, even when it seems like He is a million miles away and isn’t all too concerned with what is happening in our lives right now?

Your life may look hopeless right now. I know that the longer you focus on the problems and even accept them as the inevitable truth, that you will fall further and further away from the truth of our Lord Jesus Christ and His Word.

I know you may feel like you don’t have the strength to fight the battle any longer — that’s why Jesus told us to take His yoke, for it is light. He WILL lead you through this if you ALLOW Him to. He knows you can’t do this.

But you have to choose to believe Him and trust Him rather than the reality that is glaring you in the face right now. You have to choose to believe, by faith (not by what you see) that He is going to give you ALL that you need to get through this time.

My Daughter Do Not Fear

My daughter I am always near, I am never far away.

Yes fear and worry and doubt are in your heart. You see no answers so you see no hope.

I am your hope, I am your light, not the the answers or the solutions to your fears.

Lean not on your own understanding. My word is your strength, it says to you everything you need to know. Lean on it, feed on it and your mind will find rest.

When it is time I will lead you through the specific areas that weigh on your heart, but for now I want you to learn to trust that I am going to take care of you, of everything in your life.

You are no longer a child, stand on the truth you know, resist the enemy and he WILL flee. Trust me daughter, not your flesh, not your fears, not your thoughts.

TRUST ME and I will NEVER fail you.

I will not always rescue you from your emotions, but I will lead you to My Presence and My Peace.

Where Are You?

Why is my heart so blind to the truth.

You speak to me time and time again, yet I am still blind.

You show me the way and I don’t hear you.

I continue to cry out, “Lord help me, show me, I don’t understand!”

Amazing patience you have oh God, to wait on my stubborn flesh.

A thousand ways you show me and still I cannot see or hear you.

Why is my mind so slow to see, why is it so blind?

But my Lord, my God, you continue to pursue me, to reach out to me and tell me once again.

Then finally I see the folly in my ways,

I see it’s me and not your answer being delayed.